HOW TO FIGHT

HOW TO FIGHT

 Published: Psychology Today; psychologytoday.com

Level of Difficulty:*

BEFORE YOU READ

1.      How regularly do you get into arguments with people?

2.      When did you last have a serious argument and what was it about?

3.      Did you reach an agreement on that occasion or not?

4.      If you didn’t reach an agreement, what do you think the reason was?

5.      Would things have been different if you had acted differently?

QUESTIONS

1.      At the end of line three, the writer says “until you admit it”. What does it refer to?

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2.      What does the word “dumb” in line four mean? Answer in your own words.

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3.      What does the word “escalate” in line seven mean? Answer in your own words.

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4.      What does the word “relentlessly” in line nine mean? Answer in your own words.

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5.      In line ten, the writer says “It’s mindless, it’s not going to work and you know it”. Why is it not going to work?

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6.      In line eleven, the writer says “During arguments that feeling can get out of control”. What is the feeling that gets out of control?

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7.      A. Read the section on good arguments and stupid arguments. What are the three basic features of stupid arguments?

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B. What characteristic do good arguments have that stupid ones don’t?

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       8. A. What are the warning signs in an argument that you must look out for?

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            B. Why is winning so very important in stupid arguments?

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       9. In line forty two, what does “it” refer to in the phrase “tune it out”?

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      10. What is the best result of an argument?

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       11. Why can’t you resolve a conflict by continuing to argue?

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      12. In line fifty, what does “that” refer to in the phrase “that’s normal”?

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OPTIONAL FREE WRITING

Look at the ways in which you can prevent an argument spiraling out of control. Are there any others you would add? After writing them down and discussing them with your classmates, write a paragraph on the topic.