Tuesday, June 30, 2015

MIXED SIGNALS: WHY PEOPLE MISUNDERSTAND EACH OTHER


“The psychological quirks that make it tricky to get an accurate read on someone’s emotions”
By: Emily Esfahani Smith
Level of difficulty: **
BEFORE YOU READ
·         Watch the following video carefully: “Facial Expression Tutorial by Khappucino”
·         Now listen to the following talk and take notes:

QUESTIONS
1.       Read as far as “To Halverson”. What conclusion did Tim draw from this incident?
·         I am not getting across to them as well as I thought I was
·         How awful they have been thinking I am a jerk
·         They must think I am terribly bad tempered
·         They must think I am completely unapproachable
·         All of the above
·         None of the above
·         Other: please specify
2.       What conclusion did Tim’s team draw from the same incident?
·         He can pretend all he likes; we know his type
·         Maybe he is not as bad as we thought; this could work
·         Active listening my foot; he is a bad tempered old sod
·         He needs to get out more and learn about facial expressions
·         All of the above
·         None of the above
·         Other: please specify
3.       What conclusion can we draw from the additional examples provided in the text?  Circle the adjective(s) that won’t fit according to the text.  Complete misunderstanding of another person’s intention in saying or doing something is  quite infrequent/quite common / relatively widespread / universal / exceptional
4.       All the examples studied so far prove that………………………………………………………………………………
5.       Read the section on the transparency gap and decide whether the following conclusions are true or false according to the text:
·         We shouldn’t blame others for not seeing us for what we are
·         If people choose not to understand that is their own fault
·         We should express ourselves clearly and not expect people to read our minds
·         If we want people to understand us we should help them to
·         Hiding your feelings and expecting people to read your mind is stupid
6.       The main reason why people misread other people is the fact that …………………………………………
7.       A staff member is confused and flustered on his first few days on a new job.  Mark True or False
·         This impression will be remedied as soon as he performs better
·         This impression may prevent his future promotion
·         This impression may affect the amount of responsibility he gets given
·         People will understand that he didn’t know the job and revise their opinion at once
8.       What would happen if the above staff member consistently received a lot of praise from clients?
9.       Why are people loath to resort to system 2 thinking?
10.   What is the ultimate result of sticking to system 1 thinking?
11.   Read Dan Gilbert’s experiment to the end. When the subjects were allowed to move on from their first impression, they labeled / didn’t label the subject as an anxious person.
12.    In the same experiment preoccupation seemed to prevent the subject from reaching the correct result / encourage the subject to reach the correct result. The conclusion we can draw is that in order to accurately assess a situation it is enough to form an impression / it is necessary to focus. The rule of thumb is that first impressions are always wrong / can be wrong / are never wrong.
13.    A person with high self esteem is likely to judge another person…………………………………….because …………………………………………………………………………………………….
14.   What conclusion can we draw from the 1998 study published in “Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin”?
15.   Sending clear signals comes with an additional bonus:
WRITING TASK
Use the text and the videos you have watched to discuss the reasons why we  often misunderstand each other. Although you will need to use what you learnt in the text, you must use your own words and your own examples while completing the task.
In your introduction: discuss the transparency illusion
In your development: discuss the reasons:
·         People are cognitive misers or lazy thinkers
·         Perception is influenced by the perceiver’s experiences, emotions and biases
In your conclusion: suggest solutions; use the text and your own experience
MIXED SIGNALS: WHY PEOPLE MISUNDERSTAND EACH OTHER
This task comes with some interesting videos and a writing task so it is all inclusive. The text should be appealing in terms of content and lead to lively discussions. Hopefully the lesson will be productive and enjoyable.
1.       All of the above
2.       Other: 2 and 4
3.       Quite infrequent, exceptional
4.       There is a gap between how other people see us and how we see ourselves.
5.       Only the second one is false
6.       They are lazy thinkers.
7.       F, T, T, F
8.       The boss can engage in system 2 thinking and update his impression of the member of staff.
9.       It demands a lot of effort and mental energy
10.   Speed is traded off for accuracy in thinking about others.
11.   They didn’t label the subject as an anxious person
12.   Prevent the subject from reaching the correct result; it is necessary to focus; can be wrong
13.   Less harshly or more favorably; his sense of himself or herself isn’t threatened.
14.   If you want to solve the problem of perception, it is much more practical for you to decide to be a good sender of signals than to hope that the perceiver is going to go into phase 2 of perception.
15.   Such people are ultimately happier and more satisfied with their relationships, careers and lives.


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