Tuesday, December 22, 2015

THE CODDLING OF YOUNG MINDS


Child rearing practices vary to a certain extent but nowhere do parents have the one track mind and level of focus they have in Turkey. Parents in this part of the world have got hovering and remote control down to a fine art and keep their offspring on a tight leash from the word go. This is all very well in primary school but should certainly not be allowed to continue into university. There comes a time in all parents’ lives when they need to stand back and let their children walk forth on their own; sending kids to university is their last chance to do this. Going to university in another city is an opportunity of a lifetime for young people to finally break free and is a very different experience from staying in one’s familiar surroundings.

Leaving home to go to university is a challenge the student has to deal with on his own. Gone are the days of the school run and the ‘taxi service’ from friends’ homes; the student will have to negotiate the ins and outs of registration, university life and the city he has moved to on his own. He will have to become street wise very fast in his new environment. This is not necessary if he stays home; mum might draw the line at driving the young person to university but the bus will probably be the only difficulty he will have to contend with. The cosseting, protecting and constant interference parents run is familiar and strangely comforting to some and there is no accounting for taste but a new city will give the young person the chance grow and mature much faster.

Leaving home to go to university is also an opportunity to acquire new skills such as shopping, cooking, cleaning and the like. Gone are the days when the young person returns from school to a house which is spick and span and where a hot meal materializes magically in front of him. The young person will have to factor in time and effort to complete these tasks; a real life experience which will evade him should he stay in his hometown. The young person will have to do all his own housework starting with making his own bed, going shopping, planning meals and washing the dishes. He will have to learn to operate a washing machine, which seems like rocket science to some, practice ironing his clothes and leave enough time for work. In short, he will have to master a lot of practical aspects of day to day living; something he will never learn if he stays home under mom’s wings. All of the above activities will also mean he will have to learn to budget as he will not be able to turn to dad for more cash whenever he runs out. In brief, a young person can learn much more about life if he goes to university in another city.

To sum up, kids need to be allowed to grow up and parents need to find themselves a hobby; bringing up children is not a life time’s commitment as children do actually become adults at some point contrary to what some parents may think. One way for kids to finally let go of their mother’s apron strings is to go to another city to attend university. Delaying the inevitable beyond that point could necessitate counseling for all concerned.


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